


The Art Of Blowjobs And Eating Overly Buttery Nacho Popcorn

by PastaLeaf



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Awkward Blow Jobs, Awkward Dates, Blow Jobs, Boys In Love, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cuties, Dorks, Dorks in Love, First Dates, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Food, Hinata Shouyou is a Dork, Humorous Ending, Kageyama Tobio is a Dork, M/M, Netflix and Chill, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sexual Humor, Shameless Smut, Teasing, Teenage Dorks, rip Lisa, sorta?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 04:53:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10154084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PastaLeaf/pseuds/PastaLeaf
Summary: A date was supposed to be some romantic walk on the beach, holding each others hands well laughing like a couple of fools, then sneaking into the rocks of the caves along the shore, out of public view and making out like a couple of horny teenagers. Scratch that like the horny teenagers they were.So when Hinata invited him over for some type of potential Netflix and chill situation, with movies and popcorn. Kageyama was shocked he called it a date. Wouldn't it be more of a hangout hookup, whip out the wang and bang sort of deal.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally supposed to be fluff but well shit happens I guess.... ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Kageyama stood inches from Hinata's door, fist ready to knock. The flower's stems beginning to rub against in a palm creating some unhelpful or needed friction. He was nervous enough as it was, he didn't need some stupid flowers rubbing up on him, like some kinda drunk girl at a club. 

A date...

He had a date?

Could one even describe it as a date. 

A date was supposed to be some romantic walk on the beach, holding each others hands well laughing like a couple of fools, then sneaking into the rocks of the caves along the shore, out of public view and making out like a couple of horny teenagers. Scratch that like the horny teenagers they were. 

So when Hinata invited him over for some type of potential Netflix and chill situation, with movies and popcorn. Kageyama was shocked he called it a date. Wouldn't it be more of a hangout hookup, whip out the wang and bang sort of deal. But then again what did Kageyama know about the sort of thing, the most "date" thing he ever did was go volleyball shoe shopping with that alien emu looking fuck. Kageyama shuttered at the memory. 

"Fuck."

He muttered out kicking a potted plant next to him, as the door in front of him swung open, revealing a pj wearing unhappy fire headed boyfriend.

"Kageyama what's wrong with you kicking over Lisa like that!"

Hinata said cradling the so called potted plant called Lisa in his arms.

Kageyama couldn't help but look down at the short dumbass he called his, was he really dating someone as dumb as that. Was it even possible to date an idiot that idiotic.

"There are so many things wrong with this fucking picture."

Hinata looked up at him his face a deep red blush covering it. Uh-oh he broke out the F word the fuel to a whole lecture on the inappropriateness of the word and the implications it led to and yada yada yada. Kageyama was a dead man.

"Did you just say the F Word?"

Uh-oh he was such a dead man unless he thought of some type of distraction quickly.

"What flowers?"

Kageyama said thrusting the flowers forward, and judging by the cute way Hinata's face lit up and he began chewing on his bottom lip. Kageyama assumed he was in some sort of the clear. 

He let out a nervous sigh as Hinata took the dreadful hoe flowers out of his hand. He relucntly reached over scratching his itchy as fuck palm. But getting rid of the flowers proved another whole type of issue, involving Hinata inspecting the flowers whole heartedly, rubbing the pads of his finger tips across the multicolored petals beneath his finger tips.

'Crap'

Kageyama's heart pounded in his chest, as his warm brown eyes shone filling with some sort of happy tears as he looked at Kageyama, pulling on his soft pink lips with his teeth. Seemingly begging to be kissed, to be swept up in his arms and swung around, and kissed like nobody's business like some romantic as shit cheesy romcom. But with the way his heart pounding, Kageyama considered that an option. 

But that was a way to dorky and embarrassing thing to do, a thing Hinata would never let him live down. So he did the next logical thing he could think of, grabbing Hinata by his pj shirt collar and dragging him into the house, ignoring all the screams of the dreaded evil name 'Bakayama' until they were behind the safety of closed doors. 

Once that front door closed Kageyama awaited his fate of Hinata screaming at him. But to his surprise the latter did nothing of the sort, instead shuffling to the kitchen muttering something about

"The flowers need water and a vase."

Which in turn allowed Kageyama to catch his breath, only for it to be stolen away by the room surrounding him. It looked like some type of horrific disaster sort of thing, pillows and blankets strewn everywhere to create some weird pillow nest thing between two couches. Well having two blankets connected by duct tape to each other and their respective couches. 

"I made a pillow fort....thought it be like when I used to watch movies with my friends."

Hinata said reappearing as he pulled his face into his sweater, revealing the short shorts he was wearing underneath the huge sweater. He looked so utterly adorable, Kageyama couldn't stand it, as he made his way over to him, yanking down his sweater revealing his cute, embarrassed face. 

"It's...nuff...nuff...nice." 

Kageyama said awkwardly patting the poor confused Hinata's hair with his hands, before retreating to the pillow fort. Practically diving into the pillow fort as if to burry himself from the embarrassment in his statement among with his shame in how uncool he sounded and judging by the way Hinata's nose scrunched up, and the dimples on his cheeks shone. He had made a huge embarrassment. 

"Thank you..."

Hinata stated as his face contorted up and he clutched his sides, in a failed attempt to laugh. In that moment Kageyama deemed his boyfriend was a completely and utter dick weed.

 

"Just put on the stupid movie, already ya orange chicken looking shrimp!"

Kageyama yelled at him, averting his gaze from his boyfriend quickly but not quick enough to not notice the angry huff that left his lips as he bent over to put the movie in, or how cute those shorts made his ass look when he bent over. 

Once the loud sound signaled the movie was starting soon, Kageyama stretched out his arms if to allow Hinata to find a comforting home, safe and sound in between his legs, with Kageyama's arms wrapped around him. But unluckily for him the stupid shrimp of a dick weed had other plans. Running off to go grab something and only to return with what could be called gooey, cheesy, spicy, mess of heart clogging diabetes. 

"What is that diabetes in a bowl?"

Kageyama asked genuinely concerned for his boyfriends health, which resulted in an angry sounding huff/eye roll from his boyfriend as he plopped angrily into Kageyama's lap, thankfully missing his mini Kageyama by an inch.

"Its nacho popcorn duh."

His boyfriend countered as if nacho popcorn was some kind of normal thing that normal people ate. Which judging by the looks of it, Kageyama highly doubted that was a thing. But judging by the loud crunching of his boyfriend, it was a thing he most certainly normally ate. It made his stomach feel queasy so he decided to protest. 

"Ya know you don't have a strong stomach, and no offense but I don't feel like being Tanaka with vomit all over my di-"

All his protesting had gotten him nothing but a greasy finger to his lips and an irritated Hinata.

"Shhhh.....Bakayama the movies starting."

A defeated sigh left Kageyama's lips, as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's waist, grumbling about his health.

As time and the movie progressed, Kageyama realized one thing and one thing only. He was bored out of his fucking mind. His boyfriend has chosen had some type of movie about a little fish girl not wanting to be a fish, and causing a tsunami or some shit. Well Hinata seemed to be having the best time of his life 'pwahhhing' and 'gwahhhhhhing' at every little thing. Kageyama was more focused on how his shorts would ride up every time he moved his legs revealing more, and more pale white skin just begging to be marked up with purple and red marks. Kageyama wasn't one for the Netflix and chill thing, and didn't necessarily need any action but some kinky hot hooking up with his boyfriend, sounded a lot better than watching some angsty fish child cause a tsunami.

A smirk rose to his lips, as he lowered his hands from Hinata's hips to his thighs as he raked his nails across his boyfriends inner thighs enjoying the little hiss that left his boyfriend's mouth.

"Kageyama..."

Hinata seemed to warn a little drool pooling at his lips as he swallowed a pending moan in his throat.

"What I'm just enjoying my time with you well you enjoy your movie."

Kageyama whispered into his ear as he slowly moved his hands upwards from Hinata's upper thighs to the hem of his shorts, slowly slipping inside as one hand moved to his backside grabbing it harshly as he dug his nails into the soft supple flesh below him, as he used his free hand to wrap it around Hinata's already half hard cock as he stroked it in slow strokes.

"Kageyama."

Hinata whined out between his lips, as Kageyama's lips attacked his neck as he licked and sucked on a previous mark, feeling his boyfriend getting harder by the second.

"Shhh...just enjoy your movie Hinata."

Kageyama whispered into the soft flesh of his boyfriend's neck. He loved when Hinata would become a panting mess, moving his body closer to his in an attempt at some more friction. It was so cute and adorable, and so fucking hot it brought multiple images to Kageyama's mind a particular one of Hinata's mouth wrapped around his cock well he had two fingers buried deep in his ass, causing him to involuntary thrust his hips forward into his boyfriend's waiting ass. A low groan escaping his throat as the speed of his hand on Hinata's cock increased causing little mewls to pass past his pink lips. Kageyama wanted to see him...he couldn't help it. He needed to see his cute face scrunch up in pleasure all from Kageyama's actions. 

"Fuck it."

He moaned out between panted out between huffs of air, as he flipped Hinata and his position so that Hinata was benath him, with his sweater bunched around his chest leaving a very clear bulge in the front of his shorts visible to the human eye. 

Kageyama knew he was in some sort of predicament, normally he would take his time with Hinata, taking him apart inch by inch but his boyfriend's ADHD was pretty bad and Kageyama was fighting with a movie to keep his boyfriend's attention. Which was a uphill battle, that Kageyama was sure to lose unless he took action here and now! Which is what he planned to do as he gripped Hinata's shorts with his hands, yanking them down along with his boyfriends underwear. Not giving him time to protest before his mouth was on the already swollen tip licking it softly, enjoying the salty taste of precum covering the tip of his tongue as his Hinata's hands immediately went to his hair, yanking on it harshly as little pants of air left his mouth. Kageyama groaned in response, using one of his hands to pin Hinata's hips down so he wouldn't gag him, well his other reached around to his boyfriend's ass, gripping the flesh tightly, as he lowered his mouth, lower and lower onto his boyfriend. Relishing in the cute little sounds that left his lips, as his grip on his hair increased, and his legs found their way over Kageyama's shoulders. As he slowly bobbed up and down, running his tongue against the large vein on the underside of Hinata's cock.

"Faster...faster..."

Snuck past his boyfriend kiss swollen lips, and Kageyama obliged quickening his movements as he glimpsed upwards catching a glimpse of his boyfriend. Chest slick with sweat, back arched, as his head titled backwards and sweet sinful words past through his pure lips.

"Fuck..."

Ah there it was, Hinata was usually opposed to swearing anyway, shape or form but when he had Kageyama's lips around his cock, or fingers buried in his ass he seemed to forget his opposition to naughty words. Not that Kageyama was complaining he actually found it quite cute that his boyfriend couldn't control himself around him, and let little swears pass through his lips. Especially when his legs started shaking like now, seeming calling Kageyama to get closer, to quicken his movements because he was seemingly falling apart. Kageyama loved every second of it. Every moan, every strangled breath that would escape past his lips. 

"C-close.."

Was all that Hinata could muster before Kageyama adjusted appropriately to the situation. His grip on his boyfriend's hips increasing almost to the point of bruising, as he slowed his movements knowing Hinata liked things slow. He moved his mouth slowly up and down the shaft of Hinata's cock, relishing on how it twitched in his mouth. 

"Kageyama...oh god..."

Hinata moaned past his lips like it was some sort of prayer. It empowered Kageyama in a way to know he brought his boyfriend to such a sense of pleasure that, if he tried to stand his knees would surely buckle and he would need Kageyama's strength to hold him.

"I'm..."

A quick connection of eyes, as Kageyama slowly sucks on the tip of Hinata's cock is all it takes, as he comes undone crying out as his eyes glaze over, and his legs seem to tense up and freeze, as he spills into Kageyama's mouth, as he greedily gulps it down, grimacing slightly at the bitter taste. But it's all worth it when he sees his boyfriend's gaze lazily meeting his own. A sense of bliss and peace between the two...well for a brief second before Hinata is glaring at him, as he grabs his shorts and underwear yanking them up, as he rant and raves.

"WE MISSED THE MOVIE! I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE WE LEFT OFF YOU JERK!"

Hinata raves for a moment before the raving turns into shrieking.

"AND OH MY GOD YOU GAVE ME A HICKEY! HOW AM I GONNA EXPLAIN THIS AT PRACTICE OR TO MY MOM?! KAGEYAMA WHAT THE HECK!"

The next minute of Kageyama's life can be described as the worst minutes of his life, as he tries to pull his pissed as a fucking soccer mom boyfriend onto his lap, grabbing his hand and placing it on the obvious bulge in his pants, a smirk playing on his lips. A smirk that quickly turns to a grimace, as his Mini Kageyama is hit harshly and he was forced onto the couch, with an ice pack covering his wounded baby gravy cannon. Well his stupid ginger, demon of a boyfriend happily munched on his diabetes in a bowl, as he sat fifty some feet away from Kageyama laughing at a stupid tsunami causing bitch child. 

 

Note to future self blowjobs and nacho popcorn on dates don't mix well.

**Author's Note:**

> Whip out the wang and bang has officially become my favorite sentence I have ever written.


End file.
